Who wears a wallet chain?!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
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