Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
