I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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