Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize