there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
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To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
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He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
the raccoons are back...
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