cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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