this just has baby written all over it
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Of course I have a pirate flag
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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