I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
