We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
