I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Send help, water and tortillas.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him