...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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