check it out our google latitudes are spooning
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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