there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
