This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
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My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
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He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You've changed since you got that strap on
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
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