He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
