Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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