Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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