didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
