Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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