Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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