dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
