: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Randomize
