...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
