my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
