My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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