My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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