That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
