I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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