So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
God I need to hump something, right now.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize