Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
