How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
