...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
