In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
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I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
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She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill