Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
