A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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