Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
