even my farts smell like vagina
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
