So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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