How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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