I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
