loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.