I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize