I can text with my tongue
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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