I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize