We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize