only if we run a train.
done.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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