never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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