i barfeds in our rink
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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