he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
