What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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