Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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