so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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